I’m minutes away from embarking on the sojourn to Toronto for Christmas. The car is stuffed — I’ve decided that rIAm and I have more stuffed into the car than my family of four would take on road trips — and wonderful people are waiting for us on the other end. I’m really looking forward to seeing all them, experiencing my second Toronto Christmas, and enjoying Toronto while wedding-planning.
But I’m filled with a sad feeling, too, that I won’t be with my family for the holidays. Our traditions, once rather grand and Floridian, are fairly small. Wake up at the negotiated present-opening time, then make some breakfast and have a lazy day with the family and our new toys. At the end of the day we would walk around the corner to the neighbors for a lovely dinner. It might not sound like much, and as much as I miss Florida and would love to be there for Christmas, it’s still my family’s Christmas, and it’s nice to be there.
But I’m not the only one in this relationship, and I’m gaining a whole new (large, wonderful) family in Toronto. And their Christmas traditions are much larger. And quite lovely. But they also, much like mine used to, center around the nonni (grandparents), who are not getting any younger. I’d hate to only have one seafood feast from Nonna Anna, and Christmas dinner with all the nonni around the table. I got roughly 10 Christmas’ with my grandparents in Florida, and I don’t want to miss one this year with grandparents in Toronto. Plus, this year, knowing I can enjoy all of their company before rIAm and I hit the wedding-plans-ground running, it is even more reason to be there for the holidays.
But try explaining this to my sister, and it sounds like I’m the bad guy who doesn’t want to be with my family in Naperville. That those traditions are inadequate. Which, of course, is not the case at all. I love my family very much, they mean more to me than anything, and I cherish all the time I get with them. Which is why I was very happy — that doesn’t even do my feelings justice, but it will have to do for now — with how wonderful my family, sister especially, embraced the two nights we had together last week, in advance of the official holiday. The togetherness, generosity and everything was fantastic. And I cannot wait to help show E. Toronto next week.
While it’s hard to leave town today, I know there is an amazing and loving family waiting for us on the other end. And I can’t wait to go through all of the holidays a second year.
I wish peace and happiness to all, and joyous and wonderful holidays to each of you. Be well.
